Richard Porritt's Agenda: Momentum's purge, Theresa May's chutzpah and Henry Bolton's revolver

PUBLISHED: 06:00 18 January 2018

A Momentum supporter watches as Jeremy Corbyn gives his leader's speech during the Labour conference in Brighton

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The week's big stories, including Donald Trump heading to Davos, Klingon sensitivity and France's daftest crook

It seems the purge has begun after Momentum seized the Labour Party’s National Executive Committee this week.

Momentum founder Jon Lansman as well as Yasmine Dar and Rachel Garnham – also backed by the fanatical, Corbyn movement – have now taken their seats on then powerful committee that acts as the administrative authority of the party. And the first act of the Momentum slate? Deselect members’ favourite Ann Black as chairwoman of the disputes committee and replace her with director of Momentum Campaign Services (Limited) Christine Shawcroft.

This is the same Shawcroft who was suspended from the party herself in 2015 for supporting disgraced ex-mayor of Tower Hamlets, Lutfur Rahman.

One Labour source said: “A friend just said to me ‘this would single-handedly deter me from making a complaint’.”

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Theresa May’s Tory reboot kicked off this week following her chaotic reshuffle.

“From today we’re banning hidden charges for paying with your credit card,” the PM tweeted. “A move that will help millions of people avoid rip-off fees when spending their hard-earned money.”

Hooray! Everyone hates those sneaky extras you get charged for using plastic. This is a great news.

But do we really have the Conservatives to thank for this move? Nope. Really that tweet should have read: “From today the European Union is banning hidden charges for paying with your credit card.” I wonder if the charges will reappear post-Brexit?

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“There’s no fool like an old fool” as the saying goes... and UKIP leader and former soldier Henry Bolton is looking rather foolish. He may have dumped the 25-year-old Jo Marney, who believes black people are ugly and Meghan Markle will “taint” the royal family, but he is now facing a scrap to hang on to the top job.

“He’s an officer and supposedly a gentleman,” one UKIP NEC member told the Daily Mirror. “And what do officers do? They either resign or they take the pearl-handled revolver and a bottle of gin and do it that way.” Blimey... I know UKIP have some extreme views among their ranks but that’s pushing it.

Thankfully he added: “Just metaphorically, obviously, not literally.”

And so the great, the good and Donald Trump head off to Davos for the annual forum next week. Has anyone told him the golf club is closed during the winter?

Many were shocked when Trump announced he was attending the global elites’ yearly Swiss shindig as he continues with his nonsensical “America first” rhetoric.

Perhaps none more so than Al Gore who will once again be in Davos lobbying over the dangers of climate change. If Trump were to bump into Gore he would no doubt ask him to explain why, if the world is getting hotter, “there’s so much snow on the golf course?”

Only last month POTUS once again confused the weather and the climate by tweeting in the midst of a cold snap: “Could use a little bit of that good old Global Warming that our Country, but not other countries, was going to pay TRILLIONS OF DOLLARS to protect against.” Chilling, eh?

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The world’s first Klingon cultural centre is to open in Sweden – and Star Trek fans from across the known universe have already snapped up tickets to its opening day.

The exhibition will focus on the customs of the fictional warrior race including cuisine, martial arts, theatre and their ancient customs. But there has been some concern among fans. Diehards were concerned that the representation of the Klingon race in the newer television series – rather than the one of wobbly sets, William Shatner and Leonard Nimoy – would be included. This is apparently a very big no-no.

But Theresa Jonasson, of the Turteatern theatre, where the exhibition will be held, reassured fans: “The most common question is if the Klingons look like the Klingons in the new Star Trek TV series Discovery, which of course they do not. That series is offensive for Klingons, and should not be mentioned during the presentation.”

A clever publicity stunt? or “pc SIbI’ maw’”* as our Klingon friends might say?

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Doing drugs, kids, is dumb. Just say “no”. But one Parisian has taken dumb to a whole new level. Police in the France capital were left agog when they gazed out of the window of their station to see a man bent over the bonnet of one of their cars snorting cocaine.

After a initial moment of shock the cops dashed outside and cuffed the stupid sniffer as he was still powdering his nose at the road side. He was immediately arrested.

His mitigation wasn’t great either: “I just didn’t see I was in front of a police station.”

He was charged with drug offences.

* PC gone mad

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