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The Brex Factor: Daily Express readers furious over adverts for The New European

Steve Anglesey rounds up the losers and losers (because there are no winners) of another crazy seven days on Planet Brexit.

10. Katie Hopkins

The peroxide hate machine appears to have gone Full Icke after last Saturday’s road traffic accident near London’s Natural History Museum. Having initially deleted tweets including ‘dear tourist, right now London is not worth the risk’ when police declared the incident not terror-related, Hoppo later appeared to have a change of heart and advised followers, ‘Remember. The news is only what you have been allowed to hear. Listen widely. #LasVegasShooting #RTA’ And 48 hours later she was telling an audience in Soho that ‘I stand by the idea that it’s a terror attack. ‘I don’t shy away from that. It’s my perso0nal opinion.’ Perhaps it’s time to disband the government’s official crisis response committee and just let Katie decide on what is and isn’t terrorism. After all, she does talk an awful lot of COBRAs.

9. Jacob Rees-Mogg

Told a Tory party meeting that if Brexit is reversed ‘I would probably flee the country’. Yet another reason to Remain!

8. Henry Bolton

Bemoaning the state of modern Britain, UKIP’s new leader told TalkRadio that ‘in certain communities the indigenous Anglo-Saxon population is almost nowhere to be seen’. Not surprising, Hank, given that any school kid will tell you the Anglo-Saxon era ended in 1066 with the death of Harold and the arrival of William the Conqueror. Next week: Henry Bolton asks whether uncontrolled immigration has driven the Plantagenet majority underground.

7. John Rees-Evans

Defeated by Bolton for the captaincy of the Titanic, Rees-Evans has quit UKIP to join Affinity – not a team on The Apprentice but a new party. Its policies include ‘a new national bank which will pay 10% interest on savings and 8% on current accounts’ and ‘immigration by invitation’. No mention yet of being tough on gay donkeys and tough on the causes of gay donkeys, but perhaps John is working up to that. Rees-Evans said: ‘I am convinced beyond any question that Affinity is the most powerful weapon in the world to deliver Direct Democracy.’ In him it’s certainly got one of the biggest weapons in the world on board.

6. Liz Bilney

The CEO of Arron Banks’ Leave.EU group appeared on BBC Wales to insist ‘we haven’t seen any economic shock as a result of Brexit’. Apart from sterling losing almost 10% of its value, inflation rising nearly fivefold, growth slowing to a four-year low, the UK having the worst-performing major economy in the world and consumer credit rising to a level not seen since the financial crisis as consumers borrow to cope, she’s absolutely right!

5. Michael Gove

The launch of the environment secretary’s ban on sales of ivory went swimmingly… until the moment he was asked whether he had a piano at home and, if so, he’d looked to see if the white keys were OK. ‘Erm.. I’d better go back now and make sure,’ ad-libbed the Govester, proving that a coherent plan of what to do if Leave actually won the referendum isn’t the only thing to have slipped his mind in recent years.

4. Bernard Jenkin

The former Maastricht rebel opened a Guardian article by declaring: ‘There is no intrinsic reason why Brexit should be difficult.’ Indeed so – navigating a comprehensive free trade deal, an entirely new immigration system and a fresh customs agreement is just a piece of cake! It certainly sounds a bit more difficult than correctly filling in your expenses, but perhaps not for Bernard. In 2010 he was ordered to pay back thousands of pounds after renting a second home from his wife’s sister despite a Commons rule change stating that MPs must not use family members as landlords. Happily his dad, the former Tory minister Patrick Jenkin, helped pay it off for him!

3. Nigel Farage

The nicotine-stained man-frog declared in April that standing for election in Clacton-on-Sea would be ‘a very easy win and for me, a personal vindication to get into the House of Commons after all these years of standing in elections’. Oddly, brave Nigel neglected to do so, but we finally got a test of the former UKIP leader’s popularity in the Essex seaside town last weekend, when he brought his one-man show to the local Princes Theatre. As of the day before the gig, he’d sold a whopping 179 of the 802 available tickets. Of course, this is no indication that Farage’s popularity is waning. As manager Ian Faith explained in This Is Spinal Tap, it must just be that his ‘appeal is becoming more selective’.

2. Anne Marie Waters

Having been spotted by a New Statesman mole weeping in a Torquay car park following her failed bid for the UKIP leadership, Islamophobic Irishwoman Anne Marie is now launching her own new party too. She’s calling it For Britain, a disappointingly safe choice. Since JR-E has already claimed Affinity, we think Anne Marie should have gone with IMPACT – a near-acronym of ‘It’s My Party And I’ll Cry If I Want To’.

1. Daily Express readers

Readers of Richard Desmond’s Brexit-happy rag are furious that adverts for The New European have been appearing on the overseas version of the BBC’s News website. ‘If this had happened at in war time they would all be tried for treason,’ mused ‘Ian W’, while ‘Adrian Thomas2’ wrote: ‘The Brussels Broadcasting Corporation is a national disgrace… the people of the U.K cannot be fooled or waivered (sic).’ And most sensibly of all, there was this from ‘The Patriot’: ‘the brussels broadcasting caliphate receive 268 million pounds a year from the eu, source of information a top ranking mep in brussels by email, this is on top of the 4 billion pounds licence fee that jails british single mothers struggling to feed their children and handing them large fines from a company contracted to the brussels broadcasting caliphate.’ With a impeccable sources and a way with words like that, how long before ‘The Patriot’ gets his own column in what laughably bills itself as ‘the world’s greatest newspaper’?

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