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Dead woman taunts ‘selfish’ family from beyond the grave

María Paz Fuentes Fernández's family got a shock after her death - she had booked a local newspaper notice banning them from her funeral

Th funeral notice for María Paz Fuentes Fernández - Credit: Twitter

A woman took revenge on her family from beyond the grave by shaming them in a funeral notice.

A day after María Paz Fuentes Fernández died in the Galician city of Lugo, a newspaper advert appeared in which she had written: “Following my principles and my particular way of saying things, and since my family has not cared for me for a long time, I hereby express my last will. Only the people mentioned below can come to my funeral at church and cemetery.”

There followed a list of 15 names and a note for those not on the list: “I hope that people who have not been interested in me during my life will stay as far away as possible, as you have managed to do so far.”

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A Spanish widower has lost his inheritance after breaking the terms of his late wife’s will that demanded he not have another relationship with a woman.

The man, who has not been named, lived alone for several years after her death in 1996 but in recent years has been cohabiting with a woman who he originally claimed was his cousin.

Though financial details have not been revealed, a court in A Coruña ordered that the dead woman’s brothers should now get the money, and the husband should pay back everything he has spent so far.

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A Swiss pensioner drove several miles through the Zurich highlands without realising that one of her rear tyres had burst and she was driving only on the rim of her wheel.

The 85-year-old, named only as Elizabeth, said she “heard strange noises” coming from her red Subaru but “I never thought that the tire had already burst. The car tells you when you shouldn’t drive anymore and as long as it drives, I drive.”

After accelerating past several other drivers who were flashing signals to indicate something was badly wrong, Elizabeth finally stopped at a garage in Hittnau. Police say she may face a fine for driving a vehicle that was not operationally safe, but she insisted: “I did not do it on purpose.”

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An automatic holy water dispenser has been unveiled at a church in Tarnobrzeg, southeast Poland, as restrictions on the size of congregations are lifted in the country.

The contactless machine, which works like a soap dispenser when a member of the flock puts their hand under it, is in use at the Church of the Assumption of the Blessed Virgin Mary in the Sanctuary of Our Lady of Dzikowska at Tarnobrzeg’s Dominican monastery. It cost PLN 1,100 (around £207).

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A Dutch-Surinamese man who pretends to be a top footballer is being extradited back to the Netherlands after being beaten up by four sex workers he had hired in Colombia.

The man, named Bernio Verhagen, is said to have racked up bills at luxury hotels, apartments and restaurants around the northern coast of the south American country, claiming that electronic transfers of money would come through in a matter of days. However, his encounter with the women went wrong when they immediately demanded cash and attacked him when he could not pay.

Once a youth player for Willem II in the Netherlands, Verhagen has signed contracts with clubs in Moldova, Chile, South Africa and Denmark without playing a game.

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A Swedish woman who stabbed her sleeping husband in the neck twice with a chef’s knife told police she had stumbled while cooking and fallen unluckily.

The 60-year-old originally claimed that her partner of 40 years, who was asleep in an armchair after drinking wine and eating pork chops, had been attacked by a stranger who knocked at their door. She then changed her story and said: “I had my grey felt slippers on and they are a bit big, so I stumbled in them and fell helplessly, so f**king unluckily. It was bad luck the knife hit him in the neck, it could just as easily have been on his side.”

However, after hearing that the woman had recently Googled “the art of killing” she was sentenced to nine years in prison.

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The world’s oldest bonobo chimp is still having sex at 70 years old.

Margrit, who arrived at Frankfurt Zoo from Congo, in 1959, has outlived the average bonobo by 30 years and has had 84 offspring, They include son Mato, who at 57 is the world’s second-oldest bonobo.

A zookeeper said: “Her libido is undiminished.”

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